Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Does your husbands best {guy friend's} girlfriend/partner EXPECT YOU to befriend her as well?

My husband has been good friends w/this guy for yrs. I TRIED hanging out on and off w/his friends g/f several times but we just have nothing in common.


Long story short--it so happens that she turned out to be a 2-faced type of person who promised to keep something confidential I had told her--she ended up telling her b/f who then indirectly repeated it back to me leaving me feeling humiliated. Anyway, it doesn't matter. Because 2 yrs. ago STOPPED hanging out over there for good.


To be honest, I just never felt like my relationship w/my husband was really respected. Why? Probably because his friend wants all my husband's attention and excludes me in conversation, so I got tired of feeling insulted and stopped going there. But when it was done by his friends g/f as well, then enough was enough. They can be friends all they want to, although I don't have to put up with that PLUS his g/f always talking about all her problems and dealing w/her loud, boisterous, bombastic and spastic behavior like a crying 35 y/o trapped in perpetual pampers.


I'm so glad I don't hang out there any longer, LOL!!


Well, if you were in a similar situation, please DO SHARE!!! I'd like to know how other woman out there 'handle' this type of situation, when you really want to make your man happy by sometimes hanging out w/his friends when he wants you too, but if you got to the point due to several reasons why you just decided not to socialize w/them anymore for whatever reason--pls post.


ty





she just gets on my nerves so much. Forgot to mention that after a very long time of seeing her face2face, just yesterday she sees me in the store, asks me what I am doing. I said hello and explained I was doing a count for a company I work for [merchandising actually] w/my handheld computer. she goes in line to purchase her stuff, then across the way, calls my name out. Turning around she starts complaining how whats to happen if all these bulbs she bought don't bloom and asks what perennials are? I offer practical advice, advising the nitwit to hang on to her receipt ';just in case'; and tell this person who went to school for horticulture a few yrs. back what perennials are.


A few moments go by, it wasn't enough for her, so she REPEATS herself again like a parrot [as usual]. I repeat my answer back to her and get back to work.


She goes home telling her b/f ';she wasn't acknowledged by me at the store.';


Honestly, the nerve of her and her stupidity.


{sorry this is so long, I'm a little upset and need support right now, feeling left out of a group that it's hard to be a part of any way due to lack of manners on their part but expect me to be perfect.}Does your husbands best {guy friend's} girlfriend/partner EXPECT YOU to befriend her as well?
Your husband has rude obnoxious friends, this you have figured out and have learned to stay away from them. Ignore them and tell your husband he should not expect you to hang out with them and make yourself some new friends, Manbe your friends will be the kind that will be an example and your husband will grow up and find out he likes your friends better. You don't say his age but he has some serious growing to do or he's going to find himself very lonely when you get tired of his childish behavior.Does your husbands best {guy friend's} girlfriend/partner EXPECT YOU to befriend her as well?
Hope not. I'm kind of a loner. If I meet the spouse/gf of one of my husbands friends at a social gathering, I'll communicate there, but I'm not the coffee and chat type. I find most are clingy, whiny and interested in their 'stuff.'; I've got a full schedule with all the things I've planned on doing for years. I'm never lonely enough to want people over.





The few times I did encourage them to be friends, I ended up same way you did, so I quit that.
Bogey pretty much summed it up for me. I pretty much experienced the same kinds of things. Once I told a woman, who I thought was really a friend, an experience that had happened to me when I was a young girl only because her daughter was going through the same problem and I thought I would tell her that I understood because I went through the same thing when I was a teenager. Then about a year later she used this against me. That was the end of our friendship. I am very selective any more as to whom I get friendly with. I have 4 female friends that I have been friends with for over 35 years and over and over again they have always been there for me no matter what and never judge me. I do the same for them. When one of my friends talks to me about a problem, that problem will never leave my lips to tell anyone else. I am as safe as a priest. Wild horses could not drag it out of me. I would never tell a living soul and all of my friends are the exact same way. I feel very fortunate.
Lets just say that you are lucky these ';friends'; are not your in laws. I understand exactly how you feel because that is exactly how my in laws treat me. When they visit they don't talk to me at all, except to say hello, good bye, and what a nice visit. *gag* My daughter and my sister were downtown one afternoon and happened to run into my in laws. The in laws claim that my sister wouldn't even acknowledge them, but if you knew my sister you would know that is not possible as she is so outgoing and friendly with everyone she meets.





For lack of a better word, yes, she is very rude.
Didn't I just answer this question a few posts ago?
No she doesn't. In fact she is quite 'standoffish' and despite repeated attempts by me to befriend her she is just not interested. She is always friendly enough when we meet but wont come round for coffee or dinner when her hubby does so I just don't bother with her anymore.





I have some wonderful female friends so I don't waste time trying with her. She doesn't know what she is missing out on. Her loss not mine.
My husbands friends are not my friends and I never hang out with them and their wives/girl friends. We do have couples that we both know and have played cards with or gone to movies with. Not so much now as we have moved from the city. I have my own friends. Poppy
If I read your questionn the right way, I take it your husbands best friend is a women?


Sorry, I can't relate to that at all, it would never happen.


My husband and I are our own best friends and we rarely if ever go out with others.


My husband and I are very traditional in that we don't ever do anything to make the other feel like they aren't the most important person to us.


We visit eastern Europe often where my husband was born and even if I incourage him to visit some of his old friends from over 50 years ago for a game of cards and a few beers, he isn't interested in their company.


We have had friends on both sides from childhood but seems we have both outgrown them.
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